Funny puns one liners

Funny puns one liners

How did I escape Iraq? Iran.

One-liner has 74.80 % from 1765 votes. Vote:Tags: puns

I can't believe I got fired from the calendar factory. All I did was take a day off.

One-liner has 73.96 % from 1290 votes. Vote:Tags: puns, work

I'd tell you a chemistry joke but I know I wouldn't get a reaction.

One-liner has 73.68 % from 466 votes. Vote:Tags: puns

When I get naked in the bathroom, the shower usually gets turned on.

One-liner has 73.48 % from 725 votes. Vote:Tags: puns

I'm emotionally constipated. I haven't given a shit in days.

One-liner has 73.33 % from 1881 votes. Vote:Tags: dirty, puns

Thieves had broken into my house and stolen everything except my soap, shower gel, towels and deodorant. Dirty Bastards.

One-liner has 73.03 % from 1171 votes. Vote:Tags: life, puns

I wasn't originally going to get a brain transplant, but then I changed my mind.

One-liner has 72.12 % from 318 votes. Vote:Tags: puns

I'm reading a book about anti-gravity. It's impossible to put down.

One-liner has 71.43 % from 761 votes. Vote:Tags: puns

I'm glad I know sign language, it's pretty handy.

One-liner has 71.26 % from 403 votes. Vote:Tags: life, puns

My first job was working in an orange juice factory, but I got canned: couldn't concentrate.

One-liner has 71.15 % from 584 votes. Vote:Tags: puns